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This Month's Dare
May 2020 Shrinking the Distance Dare
As we’re encouraged to continue practicing social distancing outside our home, May’s Dare will help you and your husband stay emotionally connected inside your home. Share this list with him so together you can choose and implement ideas from the Shrinking the Distance Dare below.
* Read and discuss a devotional each morning or once a week. Here are some great couples devotional books (available in print or as e-books):
* Take a shower or bath together. There’s something about being naked in warm water that makes for better conversations!
* Create a shared journal where you both jot down interesting quotes, Bible verses, random thoughts, prayers, doodles, funny things that happened, cute things the kids said, etc. This will become a treasured record of this unique time in human history. We recommend Black Rock journals—check out this wire-bound Black Rock journal with acid-free archival pages that lay flat and a cover that isn’t too flowery for your guy (and it’s only ten bucks!).
* If COVID-19 stress has caused you to slip into rudeness or irritability with your spouse, pick a day where you both agree to a cease-fire where you practice friendliness and politeness. Don’t discuss your marriage or problems on Cease Fire Day. Say “please” and “thank you” throughout the day, show interest when your spouse speaks, and do not allow yourself to critique your spouse or make suggestions on how s/he could do better. Feel free to repeat Cease Fire Day often!
* Pray for your spouse and your marriage first thing in the morning, either together as a couple or individually.
* Leave encouraging notes for one another on the bathroom mirror or on a pad of paper. You could list “What I Like About You” or “Remember When We Had Fun Doing . . .” memories.
* Use two boxes to create “mailboxes” where you can leave notes or small gifts for one another, like a flower, candy, or funny cartoon.
* Create something together, like a board game or a card game. Here are links for blank board games and cards.
* Surprise your spouse by doing a chore that you know s/he doesn’t enjoy.
* Take turns planning an at-home date where you dress up, put on cologne, set your table with your nicest dishes and candles, and serve takeout. Or if your kids are old enough, ask them to plan an at-home date for you where they plan the menu, decorate the table, order takeout food/cook the meal, and serve as your wait staff.
* Make a Spotify playlist for your spouse to listen to while s/he does a particular at home activity. For example, a “doing yoga” playlist, a “mowing the lawn” playlist, a “cooking dinner” playlist, a “cleaning up the kitchen” playlist, a “dancing in the living room” playlist, etc. Check out our CWIVES Spotify channel for romantic and fun playlists!
* Take turns planning a meal and then cook it together. For extra fun, make it a themed meal, like Italian night or a Moroccan feast. Try a new cuisine from a place you two hope to visit someday. You could even watch a travel documentary about the place while you eat their cuisine!
* Plan a Movie Night where the kids are set up in one room with child-friendly snacks watching a movie, and you and your spouse are in another room with gourmet snacks watching your choice of movie. You can even lock your door and use that time to have uninterrupted sex.
* Have an upfront discussion about when you need time to yourself. If you have kids at home, you might even want to create a code word to let your spouse know when you’re close to your limit and need him/her to take over with the kids so you can have time to yourself. Even if you don’t have kids in your home, spouses still need time to themselves. Give each other permission to go for a drive or take a walk alone.
* Make or buy a food or beverage your spouse enjoys and surprise him or her with it.
* Serve your neighborhood or community together, whether that’s checking in with the elderly who might need you to shop for their groceries or doing drive-by parades for nursing home residents or graduating seniors.
* Rain or shine, take a walk together outside or sit outside after the kids have gone to bed. If you are running out of things to talk about since you’ve already been together all day, take turns choosing a topic. Here are great conversation starter tools to help you have more interesting and meaningful conversations:
* Take a drive together when you need a break from your four walls.
* Offer to give your spouse a massage. For added fun, use one of our flavored Mini Liquid Love Massage Lotions! They taste delicious and heat up when you blow on them!
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Dare of the Month Spotify Playlist
We’ve created a Spotify page for Tip Talk with Dr. Jennifer Degler. Listen with your husband, your kids, your friends, or just by yourself. Click the link below to enjoy:
Deck of Dares